(Elizabeth does an intricate, giddy dance)

People said, "Elizabeth, you decided to go to law school in August. You didn't even take a class to prepare for the LSAT. You went through college with the motto: 'whatever, I just have to graduate.' And your only work experience was being a sellout computer programmer."

"What's your point?" I ask.

"What on Earth makes you think you can get into UW Law?"

My LSAT score. That's what. Okay, my second-try LSAT score. But my first-time one was decent and together, they are a dynamic duo. An ambiguously-gay dynamic duo. In spandex. And a shiny car with jets. And when they drive by, the chicks scream.

My essay is almost done and its awesome. My recs are in and one recommender said my work was "distinctive". I think this is actually going to happen.

I can't believe it.

And the winner of the new, most unnervingly-named reality tv series is...

Who's Your Daddy?

A show where an attractive blond woman in a fancy black cocktail dress picks out biological her father from a bunch of older men in tuxedos. She was adopted when she was 6 months old. What a perfect way to be both incredibly creepy and remind everyone how important bioligcal relations are. Ah, you sly Fox, you.

Point/Counterpoint

"Does animal feed put people at risk?" says the header in Consumer's Report. Underneath are two perspectives:

No

The CEO of American Feed Industry Association. In the picture there is a man who looks kind of like Dave Thomas and kind of like Santa Claus. He clearly has no idea what's going on. He has quotes like, "naw, our food is just fine" and "don't you worry your little head about it. We'll take care of everything".

Yes

The director of Food Policy Institue at the Consumer Federation of America. Her picture is taken with a night-vision camera in what appears to be a government office. She has her arms crossed and is looking sternely into the camera, as if to say, "we're watching you". She makes serious, well-founded accusations.

A fair fight if I ever saw one.

Who would have thought?

So, I lost this $600 check from my temp agency back in August. I finally called them about it a month ago and they never got back to me. I waited and waited until my bank account was small enough to put fear in my heart and then I called them again today. They figured out which check it was, cancelled it (costing me $29 bucks), and sent me a new one. But I was like, "hey, better $570 than nothing. That's the way the cookie crumbles."

I started looking for a library book I borrowed on Stefanie's card and, of course, lost. I went through all these papers and envelopes and I didn't find it. But guess what I did find? The goddamn check. And then Alanis Morisette winked at me.

It's so taxing

How it started: I got up at 10 AM with a whole day ahead of me. I was going to work on my personal essay, read the motion on the Washington Gay Marriage case, do some errands.

What I have done so far: Spent 2 hours making latkes and forgetting to add salt.

How I got back on track: I ate all the latkes in like 4 minutes then flopped down on the couch.

What I am doing now: Looking at jobs on craigslist even though I have one already.

Yesterday I went to my first training for my tax site management job. It was awesome. Do you know what qualifies a child for the EITC (earned income tax credit)? I do. And I haven't even taken the big 40-hour course. Then I will be unstoppable. I will be able to do people's taxes from 50 miles away. I will be able to itemize deductions by snapping my fingers and, when I blink, all your credits will become refundable.

The training was actually for tax preparers (as opposed to site managers) so whenever they came to something complicated, the instructor would say, "Well, that's when you would talk to your site manager and they'll tell you what to do". This was not the least bit unnerving.

You know what I hate? I hate when you turn on the TV and accidently get caught up in a series finale. You think you're going to watch some funny, mindless show and BAM you end up sobbing like an idiot while people say things like, "thanks for ... everthing". Today it was Fraiser. They should put warnings on these shows.

Warning: The following show will not be funny. If you're lucky, it will be cathartic. But, most likely, you will just end up with a stuffy nose and late for the bus.